Crazy Rich Asian

I watched Crazy Rich Asians today with J and the kids.

Although I found this movie amusing and entertaining, as a 3rd generation chinese descendant who was brought up in a big (i mean BIG) family, I can relate to this story so much.

I remember my younger year, where I lived with my Ama and Akung (GrandMa and GrandPa from my father's side) along with my Aunts and Uncles in 1 house, before My Grandparents buy another house 2 doors away from our house.

I remember my Grandpa Rolex with foggy glass and glasses so confex it makes your eyes hurt.

And my Ama... my Ama is the strongest figure in my Dad's family. My Akung is a quiet man who used to walk my brother for afternoon stroll and send me off to school while he is on his way to market to buy fishes to make hiewan for us.

My Uncles and Aunts all bows to my Ama. And I am her favorit granddaughter, as I spent my childhood sleeping with her among her snoring. There she would told me not to married a westerner nor people from another island and stereotyping them.

My Mom, and my Uncle's wives would eventually take turns confessing to me how life is tough for them under my Ama apprentice. The newest member will receive harshest treatment, which will lessen with time as you bear children [preferably son], who bear my Akung family name.

I learned how important a son is for any daughter-in-law to secure position as preferred family member in my Ama eyes.

And how she played mahjong with her elderly friends, some of whom still have their feet bounded.

Then there's this story about struggle to achieve higher economy status in life. How they have to be savvy to survive with 9 kids [my father being the eldest].

My Dad eventually moved out to a new house by the time I was in my 11th grade. I only stayed in that house for 1 year before I went for my university degree in US [no, not Calstate Fullerton]. And my time with my BIG family became a distance memory.

But when J came to Sby before my Ama passed away, she always said that I was the cruel one. 🤣🤣 dunno why she said that. May be I unintentionally hurt her with something I did.

Then this movie .....

Crazy Rich Asians is not only about money and power. It's about the matriarchal power inside the patriarchal social frame, of Ama that everyone considered as 慈禧太后 [the Empress Dowager Cixi] from the Qing Dynasty.

It's about the burden of expectation being the son that will inherit the throne of the family power.

It depicts beautifully about mother|daughter love hate relationship which at the end shows that motherly live prevails when all other love ends (which makes me cry so hard holding on to my girl's hand).

It's about how hard educated woman is appreciated in traditional chinese family because you are expected to do 3M [macak, masak manak], until there's a popular saying, why should one need to go to university if you only end up in the kitchen [and in bed].

It's about beautiful female friendship, who offer silent hug or just a shoulder to cry on like what Peik Lin to Rachel, or Rachel to Astrid. Just silently be there. Without judging. Something that is so difficult to find nowadays.

But most of all, it is about finding your own destiny, and fighting for what tour heart long for...

And I end the day by wishing my Uncle and Aunts & cousins in HongKong, safety from Mangkhut Typhoon.

Disclaimer: We are not the Crazy Rich Chinese Surabayans that was described by the viral posts. But rest assure I knew people who did exactly that. 😂

Cibubur, 16 September 2018